Taco Bell to Double Artificial Ingredients In Products


After an announcement by fellow Yum! Brands company Pizza Hut earlier this week to remove all artificial flavors and coloring from their foods, Taco Bell has announced that they will be doubling  the amount of artificial content in their products.


Brian Niccol, the brave and innovative chief chef and CEO of Taco Bell, described why Taco Bell is making this transition. “In a time when 1 in 6 Americans face hunger on a daily basis, we want to make sure that Taco Bell stands as a beacon of hope and inspiration for the world. Americans last year threw out over 1 trillion calories worth of food, and frankly we want to make sure that any materials not used by Pizza Hut are going into our ‘burritos’ and ‘tacos’.”


This pioneer of conservation and care for the disenfranchised in the United States has received much support from the company’s base: young people. Local suburban middle schooler Hank Dermot had this to say about Taco Bell’s recent progressive stride forward: “I don’t care! Leave me alone! You’re an adult and you don’t understand me!”

Highschoolers and broke college students were equally excited about this change. Randy Chan, a third-year freshmen at Ygnacio Valley High School in Concord California expressed his opinion saying, “I wonder how this will change the delicious flavors of the Beefy Fritos Burrito or the Quesorito. Those are like the staples of my like diet.” Art school dropout and college loan debtor Peace Juniper Sigϋenza corroborated this point, including, “I learned a lot about my heritage through Taco Bell, and I really hope this change of ingredients doesn’t change that.”

–Mark Wilson


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