Hard Copy Satire is thrilled to announce its candidacy for SGSU Junior Representative! With two years of experience at SU under our belt, we are ready to enter our junior year with satire and humor unlike anything you’ve ever seen.
To demonstrate what your commitment means to Hard Copy, here is our list of promises if we get elected:
Reducing the fire wok, pasta, and sushi lines by 50%
Forcing Provost Crawford to stay at SU and do his goddamn job
Lemieux Library will stock ONLY Immanuel Kant and Dr. Seuss
The Spectator will be shut down permanently
SU will found and open The College of Memes and Pepes
Hard Copy is ready to represent the student body at a whole new level. Also, if we don’t win then we’ll stop writing satire.
— Donnie Rhoads