Baby-boomer Writes New Opinion Piece Directed at MRCSC


Seattle, WA — You guys are like a nonviolent, POC-led lynch mob that is open to due process if Dean Kelly is placed on leave without pay in the meantime. Historically, that is what lynch mobs are like.

I was a liberal back in the 60s. Free love was fucking wild man and the music was rad. Me and my white friends learned not to be racist anymore. How could you possibly say that racism (a) still exists or that (b) Dean Kelly is racist if her best friend was black? Everyone knows that you just need one black friend to be absolved. Also this is S-E-A-T-T-L-E, where the majority of people are white but we are really good at not being racist because we are super liberal and drive Subarus.

If you kids hate the school so much then transfer! That’s how I always respond to injustice. One time my house got robbed and the police caught the robbers. Instead of bringing justice to them, I just told the cops that I would switch neighborhoods.

Also, shouldn’t you kids have been able to tell what the curriculum was? While the school advertises itself as more diverse than it actually is and it sells MRC as the experimental college, you should’ve know it was going to have a bunch of whites and a very traditional curriculum.

Also, don’t you know that White thought is the best thought? Enlightenment thought is awesome because it’s super rational and has only led to good things like free speech, anthropocentrism that treats the Earth as nothing more than a resource that fuels progress, freedom of press, the rigid categorization of Black people as subhuman, a fair criminal justice system, and a democracy where people vote with money! Why would you want to learn about anything else?

Kids, you learn about PoC authors almost exclusively in Poverty in America and Global Poverty according to Dean Kelly. How could you find that racist? Oh, you think that this implies that PoC’s voices belong only in discussions involving poverty and not in discussion about the ‘human person’ or ‘history’. Ya, I guess that’s kinda fucked.


Dick Whiteliberal

-Chip Otlecoli


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