President Sundborg To Quarantine Casey To Prevent Racism From Spreading

quarantine

SEATTLE, WA — Father Sundborg announced in a press conference last week that he finally gets what the MRC coalition is protesting. “They kept saying Dean Kelly is racist, Dean Kelly is offending us, Dean Kelly isn’t addressing our needs. And I just didn’t know what this racist thing was, so I ignored them.” Said Sundborg in his official statement. “But then someone said it was making them sick and it all clicked. Racism is a disease! So I am quarantining Casey and sending Dean Kelly home until she recovers, so no one else is hurt and/or catches this awful racist bug.” The release seemed to anger many, with students claiming that the President was ignorant to their needs. We at Hard Copy however are happy that the whole issue has been solved, and the protests ended peacefully!

-Juan Albrook

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s