Kid Rubs Eyes Bloodshot to Seem More Stoned


Hometown, USA – “I’m so high! Woah man, is this real life?! Does anyone have a box of Cheez-Its? I have such a bad case of the munchies right now! You all know what I’m talking about because you are all also high! Wow, I think I’m hallucinating! Does anyone else see that funny elephant? I can’t stop staring at my hand! Wow, smoking marijuana is such fun! I’m such a pot-head! We’re all pot-heads! Pot-head friends… Friends… Best friends… Being high is the tops!”

This went on for another couple of minutes, as Maddy Lumpenshitz’s friends ignored her, and continued discussing Shakespearian symbolism in modern fiction.
–Joey Fatöne


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