We at Hard Copy are usually dedicated to satire and to the absurd, but this time we really aren’t joking. The student organization ‘Reignite the Mission,’ an organization committed to radical catalyzation of the mission of Seattle University, is in a dire need of help. Us Hard Copy staff members, recognizing the influence we may have, have decided to use this as an opportunity to make the world a better place.
That’s why we are asking you to help us raise money so that ‘Reignite the Mission’ can get some more cigarettes.
If you can’t seem to put together a few nickels to help this organization, worry not. Based on some of their demands such as University divestment from fossil fuels and other industries and a removal of police presence from the school, we are guessing they probably like Marlboro. Though American Spirits have less chemicals too, but they have a racist logo.
Thank you for doing what you can to help Reignite the Mission. Onward to a more just and humane world.
— Hard Copy