Gary Johnson Makes His Family Pretend He’s President


Hard Copy received an opportunity to spend the past weekend at the Johnson residents’ estate in New Mexico. There, we made the discovery that former Libertarian presidential candidate Gary Johnson forces his two children and his fiancée to pretend that he won the presidential election by a landslide. In the morning, when Gary walked into the kitchen, both children simultaneously said robotically, “Good morning, President Dad.” On the day of the inauguration, Johnson unplugged the television, disconnected the Wi-Fi, and held a mock inauguration for himself in the living room, in which his fiancée swore him in with a an old copy of Where the Sidewalk Ends, which he wrote over with sharpie, “Bible.”

This is not healthy behavior for a 64 year old, but it may be healthy behavior for Gary Johnson.
— Juggsy Wuggsy


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