2018 Quadstock Headliners Announced: Nelly, Louis C.K., R. Kelly, Aziz Ansari, Nick Carter, and Matt Lauer

Seattle University – After the Sean Kingston incident of Quadstock 2017, this year’s festival bookers made a point to thoroughly investigate the performers they would be hosting in 2018. After much deliberation and heavy scrutiny, the Students Events and Activities Council was finally able to announce the long-awaited line-up, which was sure to contain zero…

Hard Copy Leaks the 2017 Quadstock Line-Up!

Hard Copy was given classified information regarding who is playing this year’s Quadstock Festival. We were sworn to secrecy by SEAC, but we just cannot let this information go unsaid any longer: 1.)  Morado – this SU band won SEAC’s annual Battle of the Bands, and is sure to put on an incredible indie-rock performance…

Father Sundborg Tried To Crowd-Surf During Quadstock

SEATTLE UNIVERSITY – Several students required medical attention after Fr. Stephen Sundborg, President of Seattle University, attempted to crowd-surf during “Bass Down Low” by Dev. Sundborg rushed the stage and then leaped into the audience, sending several attendees straight to the concrete. Sundborg was not available for comment. Within a few hours of the incident,…

Up-And-Coming Rapper “Schoolboy Sundborg” to Headline Quadstock

SEATTLE UNIVERSITY – Excitement is in the air following the Quadstock Reveal Party, as it was announced that Schoolboy Sundborg will be headlining the annual Seattle University concert. Sources close to SEAC say that it’s relatively surprising that Schoolboy Sundborg hasn’t performed at Quadstock before, given that the talented artist literally works at SU. An…

President “Steve-Daddy” Sundborg Breaks Silence on Hard Copy

Dear Lightweights, Losers, Lackeys of Seattle University, I know it may surprise you that the President of the University is writing into Hard Copy, but implore you to hear my story. Although it is in its delicate, precarious infancy and employs writers as disreputable as the notorious “whorf” and “Owen Goetz,” I’ve become quite fond…