Editorial: What is that ball of light in the sky?

Seattle – Every once in a while, the naturally grey sky will mysteriously become blue, and a large, gaseous ball of blinding yellow and orange fire will make everything look brighter. Hard Copy investigated this ball of light, and discovered that this is actually the sun. We were shocked to realize that the sun shows…

Veganism Hasn’t Decreased Friend’s Dickishness

Fremont, Seattle — Sources close to local asshole and college student Aidan Smith reported that after becoming a vegan, Smith is “just about as much of a dick as before.” “Yea at first when he told us he was going vegan, we were really worried that Aidan would become even more of a dick,” a…